Hey InBev, Suck My InButt.

So the Board at AB stood up to those lousy Belgian bastards and said "Hell no, we won't sell." This, of course, is just a first step along a long and rocky path. InBev has already started the hostile take over process in that they are suing AB in DC (you like all the initials?) to clarify the power of shareholders to dismiss AB Board members. Until AB is free and clear from this aggression from across the pond keep buying that Budweiser. (Ironically enough, I finished my Bud yesterday and am sitting here with a cold, crisp, and fresh "Go Blue Brew" in my hands.)

Now that I have discussed the beer related issues of the day I can move on to other things. As you may have noticed I have not been posting a lot lately. This is mostly because in the summer time my mind is focused on work, not sweating, and baseball. Since these three things take up the entire day I don't have much time for blogging. (This is a total lie but I am going for it.) But since I am using them as excuses I may as well write about them.

Work: I am working at a legal clinic this summer. I represent those people that could not afford legal representation normally because of economic and social constraints. (Yay, I get to play the role of a bleeding heart for a while.) It is very enlightening work and it really is getting me some great experience. An added plus is that I don't get paid so...okay...well...I do get free parking downtown....wait....no I don't....um...I'll get back to you...but it really is fun.

Not Sweating: Now that it is summer, I open the door in the morning, wearing a suit and tie I walk to my car, and before I reach my car, I have already sweat all the way through my shirt. I get in the car, crank the AC, and finally get cooled down about a block away from work. I then park the car, walk more blocks to my office, and greet my secretary looking like Steve Prefontaine after a quick 10k. Going to the office looking like a contestant from "Wipeout" is one thing but making an appearance in court is quite another. I don't think judges get the right idea about a lawyer when they are sweating profusely. I have noticed most of the judges lately have been handing down the maximum legal punishments to my clients.

Baseball: The Cardinals are over-achieving according to the national media. According to Bubba Tunes, however, they are under-achieving. The Cubs should never, ever be ahead of the Cardinals in the standings. I don't care if the Cubs are undefeated halfway through the season, there is no excuse. Luckily our mash unit of a ball club has been playing their tails off and been getting some good results but after being swept at home by the Royals and then losing two of three to the Tigers, the ol' Red Birds need to get some wins under their belt.

I have finished two fine Buttsweiser products and have become sleepy for some reason. Dammit Lukas! You spiked these, didn't you? I have lost all ability to concentrate....must watch TV...must stop writing...beer power taking over...have to order nachos....NACHOS!

Michael and Shannon become one collective Butts.

I will be traveling to Pure Michigan this weekend to celebrate the wedding of Michael and Shannon. Let me be the first on the Internets to congratulate you.

APPLE BOTTOM JEANS AND BUTTS TAKING THE PLUNGE!

...sucker.

If you want AB you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead hand.

As you may have heard, the Belgian beer giant, InBev, has made an buy out offer to Anheuser-Busch. Needless to say this deal must not go through. AB is the last major brewery in America that is actually American owned. (I don't count Coors because they merged with Molson and have a marketing partnership with SABMiller, both foreign companies.) AB has been based in St. Louis since its creation in 1852 (although officially incorporated in 1875) and has been a pillar of the community ever since. Even during the dark days of prohibition, AB was one of the only breweries to remain open and provided much needed jobs to the region. Today AB is the largest U.S. based brewery creates more revenue for the St. Louis region than their books indicate. More than just providing jobs at the corporate headquarters and the brewery, AB uses local advertising agencies, distribution centers, and delivery services. They also provide millions of dollars in tourist revenue in St. Louis and around the country with their ownership of Sea World, Busch Gardens, and various other theme parks. The charitable work they do goes largely unreported but almost every single charity, school, and church in St. Louis has been touched by AB's generosity. Both St. Louis University and Washington University receive large donations from AB every year. Many churches receive free kegs of beer for annual picnics and festivals. AB also supports organizations all around the world. Check it out.

Not to be Chicken Little or anything but all of this would end should InBev be successful in their buyout plans. InBev has a history of brutally and heartlessly slashing costs. Any and all "unnecessary" programs would be cast aside to bring up the bottom line. They don't recognize the importance of building up the community and creating good will. Sitting in Belgium and Brazil, the owners just want the money and the Budweiser brand name. Think of AB as Callahan Auto and InBev as Zalinsky Auto Parts. You are Tommy Boy. Get the job done. The AB shareholders and consumers must put forth a concentrated effort to block this take over so go to www.saveAB.com to see how you can help. One of the best ways is to keep buying Budweiser and other AB produced beers and keep buying stock in AB and hopefully we can push up the value of AB so high that InBev would not be able to afford it.

Too Busy to Post Today

...so just watch a funny G-rated video.

Now What The Hell Am I Supposed to do on Spring Break?

It is with a heavy heart and a gutter ball that I announce the moving of the International Bowling Hall of Fame and Museum from downtown St. Louis to Dallas. You may think this is just me being funny but I seriously am pissed about this. The Bowling Hall of Fame is a hallmark of this young blogger's life. I am not a big bowler person. My average is probably somewhere around -89 but I have been to the Bowling Hall of Fame probably around 30 times. I love that damn place. If you live in the St. Louis area get your ass down there before they close doors. It is there you will find a brief history of the sport, an overview of bowling's cultural significance, its role in politics and the shaping of our great nation, and of course the car shaped like a bowling pin. The Hall of Fame portion of the...um...Hall of Fame is nothing extraordinary, just plaques with faces, names, and career highlights of great bowlers past and present, but after being to Canton, Ohio, it ranks up there with the NFL Hall of Fame. After you have picked your jaw off the ground in the Hall of Fame head on down to the basement and roll a few frames. You can use modern equipment and lanes or turn back the clock and use the old timey lanes with duckbill pins and a pin monkey at the end to return your ball to you by hand. (Note: pin monkey is not an actual monkey but rather an employee that sits at the end of the lane and rolls your ball back to you.) Seriously get to the Bowling HOF and fast.

Oh, here is your video for today. Man they love their mayor in Detroit. I wouldn't be surprised if they rename the Ren Cen after him. The Kwame Towers. I can see it now.

Well, Well, Well. Look Who We Got Here.

It looks like I have some competition in the blogosphere (which is slightly below that Ionosphere.) Now since I only have ten minutes before I have to go back to work, I will be lame and post a video in order to keep thing fresh. If you are fan of Weezer, enjoy. If you are fan of YouTube quasi-celebs, enjoy. If you are fan of neither, enjoy and then post scathing comments about how lame everyone else is except for you.



I don't actually know 75% of the references in the video but I find it entertaining none the less and the song is catchy.